Over the past few weeks, I have spent a lot of time thinking about how much I am praising God for bringing us into a new chapter of life. He’s given our family a fresh start, and we are overwhelmed with gratitude. He is good, gracious, and generous. He gives us far more than we deserve, and I want thanksgiving and praise to be the rhythm of my life, always.
I want to say, without hesitation, “God, you are so good.”
I want to say that when faced with struggle. Those struggles and difficulties can take many forms. In our family, we struggled when my husband worked long hours on a night shift. We struggled with exhaustion, anger, and questioning God.
In the midst of every situation, Lord, let me shout to the heavens and all the ends of the earth that you are good. You are faithful. You are forever working for Your glory.
This fall, I was involved with an incredible mom’s group in Nashville called MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers). The group was a wonderful opportunity to meet and befriend moms in a similar life stage, and it was also a chance to study the Word with each other. During each meeting, we’d discuss a different “I am” statement about God in the Bible. (If you’re interested in learning more, I’d encourage you to check out Lysa Tyerkeurst’s Bible study Finding I Am.)
One week stood out to me in particular as we studied John 6—Jesus feeding the 5,000. It’s where Jesus boldly declares, “I am the bread of life.” Let’s take a look:
After this, Jesus crossed the Sea of Galilee (or Tiberias). A huge crowd was following him because they saw the signs that he was performing by healing the sick. Jesus went up a mountain and sat down there with his disciples.
Now the Passover, a Jewish festival, was near. So when Jesus looked up and noticed a huge crowd coming toward him, he asked Philip, “Where will we buy bread so that these people can eat?” He asked this to test him, for he himself knew what he was going to do.
Philip answered him, “Two hundred denarii worth of bread wouldn’t be enough for each of them to have a little.” One of his disciples, Andrew, Simon Peter’s brother, said to him, “There’s a boy here who has five barley loaves and two fish—but what are they for so many?”
Jesus said, “Have the people sit down.”
There was plenty of grass in that place; so they sat down. The men numbered about five thousand. Then Jesus took the loaves, and after giving thanks he distributed them to those who were seated—so also with the fish, as much as they wanted.
When they were full, he told his disciples, “Collect the leftovers so that nothing is wasted.” So they collected them and filled twelve baskets with the pieces from the five barley loaves that were left over by those who had eaten. When the people saw the sign he had done, they said, “This truly is the Prophet who is to come into the world.” Therefore, when Jesus realized that they were about to come and take him by force to make him king, he withdrew again to the mountain by himself.
I want to stop right there for a moment. We see that a huge crowd is following Jesus. John writes that there are 5,000 men. When you factor in all the women and children, there are actually more like 15,000 people present. For my Nashville friends, that’s like an almost full Bridgestone Arena during a Predators game. It’s no small number! And it seems that the crowd is relatively subdued. There’s no mention of riots or discourse. The people are following Jesus, submitting to his authority and power. They can tell this man is different. This man is God.
“Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith and in purity”
Jesus tests Phillip—He already knows what He is going to do. I love that He turns to a young boy for help. This boy has two fish and five loaves, which Jesus uses to perform this miracle. You are never too young in age or too new in your faith to be used by God.
Through the other gospel writers, we learn that Jesus has previously withdrawn with his disciples to rest and pray. He’s spent time with the Father before addressing the crowd. He has compassion on them because they are like sheep without a shepherd. He teaches them about the kingdom of God. He also cures their sick.
Notice what happens before Jesus’ miracle. After spending time with God and welcoming the crowd, He has everyone sit down. Then He gives thanks (verse 11).
Matthew says, “He took the five loaves and the two fish, and looking up to heaven, He blessed them.” (Matthew 14:19)
Next, He takes the loaves and fish, and He miraculously creates more food. This was something that I never fully understood until a few months ago, when our pastor in Nashville, Jeremy Rose, preached on Luke 9. He taught us that Jesus created more fish and bread because He is our Creator. He created the heavens and the earth, as well as everything in them. (Genesis 1:1) Jesus shows His power and prayed first to the Father to let everyone know this power came from Him.
We cannot place limitations on what God can do. Jesus can be trusted. He uses what the disciples have, and He makes it into what He needs. Jesus can truly do anything. He is our provider.
After feeding the crowd—which remember is about the size of a packed Bridgestone Arena—the disciples collected 12 baskets of leftovers. It’s no coincidence the 12 disciples gather 12 baskets of leftovers. We as God’s disciples are called to make more disciples. (Thanks, Pastor Robby, for that insight!)
Evening arrives, and Jesus’ disciples set off across the lake for Capernum. Jesus had not yet joined them. They’ve sailed about three or four miles, it’s dark, and a storm is coming. Suddenly, Jesus is walking across the water toward them. Seriously, is there anything this man can’t do? (Nope. He’s God!) The story continues:
When they found him on the other side of the lake, they asked him, “Rabbi, when did you get here?”
Jesus answered, “Very truly I tell you, you are looking for me, not because you saw the signs I performed but because you ate the loaves and had your fill. 27 Do not work for food that spoils, but for food that endures to eternal life, which the Son of Man will give you. For on him God the Father has placed his seal of approval.”
Then they asked him, “What must we do to do the works God requires?”
Jesus answered, “The work of God is this: to believe in the one he has sent.”
So they asked him, “What sign then will you give that we may see it and believe you? What will you do? Our ancestors ate the manna in the wilderness; as it is written: ‘He gave them bread from heaven to eat.’”
Jesus said to them, “Very truly I tell you, it is not Moses who has given you the bread from heaven, but it is my Father who gives you the true bread from heaven. For the bread of God is the bread that comes down from heaven and gives life to the world.”
“Sir,” they said, “always give us this bread.”
Then Jesus declared, “I am the bread of life. Whoever comes to me will never go hungry, and whoever believes in me will never be thirsty. But as I told you, you have seen me and still you do not believe. All those the Father gives me will come to me, and whoever comes to me I will never drive away. For I have come down from heaven not to do my will but to do the will of him who sent me. And this is the will of him who sent me, that I shall lose none of all those he has given me, but raise them up at the last day. For my Father’s will is that everyone who looks to the Son and believes in him shall have eternal life, and I will raise them up at the last day.”
At this the Jews there began to grumble about him because he said, “I am the bread that came down from heaven.” They said, “Is this not Jesus, the son of Joseph, whose father and mother we know? How can he now say, ‘I came down from heaven’?”
“Stop grumbling among yourselves,” Jesus answered. “No one can come to me unless the Father who sent me draws them, and I will raise them up at the last day. It is written in the Prophets: ‘They will all be taught by God.’ Everyone who has heard the Father and learned from him comes to me. No one has seen the Father except the one who is from God; only he has seen the Father. Very truly I tell you, the one who believes has eternal life. I am the bread of life. Your ancestors ate the manna in the wilderness, yet they died. But here is the bread that comes down from heaven, which anyone may eat and not die. I am the living bread that came down from heaven. Whoever eats this bread will live forever. This bread is my flesh, which I will give for the life of the world.”
Then the Jews began to argue sharply among themselves, “How can this man give us his flesh to eat?”
Jesus said to them, “Very truly I tell you, unless you eat the flesh of the Son of Man and drink his blood, you have no life in you. Whoever eats my flesh and drinks my blood has eternal life, and I will raise them up at the last day. For my flesh is real food and my blood is real drink. Whoever eats my flesh and drinks my blood remains in me, and I in them. Just as the living Father sent me and I live because of the Father, so the one who feeds on me will live because of me. This is the bread that came down from heaven. Your ancestors ate manna and died, but whoever feeds on this bread will live forever.” He said this while teaching in the synagogue in Capernaum.
This passage fires me up. There’s so much goodness we can take away from Jesus' miracle. He is our great provider, the bread of life. He is worthy of praise in every situation.
I need to be constantly reminded of this truth.
In 2018, two months into our marriage, my husband started a job working nights—consistently 60 to 80 hours a week, including many major holidays. The very same weekend he started his job, we found out we were expecting! (You can read more about that here.) For the next 16 months, he got up every day and went into work at that job. Through our first year of marriage, through my pregnancy, and through our son’s newborn stage, he went to work at a job that slowly sucked the life out of him and greatly challenged our relationship. Ultimately, it challenged our trust in God.
When he got a new job—with a normal day schedule—this past October, we praised God with all our might. We cried tears of joy for His provision of a great job, great company, and great location. We felt God writing a new chapter. We felt peace and excitement.
For the first time in over a year, I felt like I could exhale. This was an opportunity for our family to finally be together and experience quality time with one another. We could make friends together. Get involved with church. Sleep and wake up at the same time. I felt so much relief and gratitude with this job opportunity.
And then I felt conviction.
What if God didn’t provide this job? What if He kept us in that difficult season? Would I still be able to say, God is good? Would I still praise Him?
I pondered that a lot. I so wanted things to work out my way, to go according to my plan. I felt like a year and a half was too long for that struggle to go on. I continually asked God why, and I began to doubt Him.
But Jesus’ actions in John 6 showed me that God is worthy of all praise—in all situations.
Jesus is our provider. He thanked the Father before the miracle. He spent time alone with Him in prayer before feeding the crowd. He gave glory to God before pursuing His ministry.
“Consider it a great joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you experience various trials, because you know that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its full effect, so that you may be mature and complete, lacking nothing.”
I want to have a heart like Christ. I want to thank my dad above for all He that He provides, even when it looks a lot different than what I desire. Jesus is the bread of life, and He alone can care for our every need.
God knew I needed this hard season to help me trust Him more. He used it to strengthen my faith in Him, as well as to strengthen my marriage. I now have more empathy for others. I have also seen firsthand that the deep satisfaction and contentment of my soul can only come from Christ alone. I won’t find that in my marriage, my children, my home, my work, my bank account, or even in my sleep schedule.
Only in the bread of life.