Raise your hand if you’re feeling restless.
I’m willing to bet you’re holding both hands up high.
During this time of the coronavirus pandemic and social distancing, we’re all feeling a bit stir-crazy in our homes. It’s important to keep perspective and do our part to prevent the spread of this potentially fatal virus. And if you’re healthy, remember that the elderly and immune-compromised thank you.
Restlessness isn’t fun, but restlessness can be a gift.
God has taught me so much about restlessness this past year as a stay-at-home mom. I’ve had to adjust my definition of productive. I’ve had to see the value in spending more time at home and doing seemingly little things that often feel invisible. Last fall I wrote about my transition from career woman to stay-at-home mom. Here’s an excerpt:
I love being a SAHM. I love staying home with my son, and I feel incredibly grateful to have the opportunity to do so. I know this isn’t the case for many moms who desire to stay home but need two incomes to support their families. While, yes, we’ve had to make some financial sacrifices—like continuing to rent rather than buying a home and driving one car rather than two—the choice has been easy. This is what is best for our family.
Yet the prideful, approval-loving part of my heart still felt wounded when I was straight-up told no to my offer to work remotely. Since handing in my resignation letter, I’ve reached out to my editorial contacts to begin writing again, something I very much love to do. I’ve either been denied or ignored, and it’s frustrating.
Working is what I’ve done my whole life—from school to college to full-time career woman in NYC and Nashville. It’s what I know. It’s what’s comfortable. I enjoy working, and I am constantly striving to be “successful.” (Goodness, whatever that means.) I also tend to compare myself to others, so when I’ve been asked what my son and I do all day, I instantly turn from confident to sheepish.
I felt like I had to justify the statement, “I’m a stay-at-home mom.” But I truly feel proud of my job now—not sheepish. I’ve had months to process my new vocation. Through it, the Lord has prepared me for this time of social distancing and isolation and provided perspective I can now share with you.
Our worth doesn’t come from our jobs, our bank accounts, the number of groups and activities we engage in, or how much we check off our to-do lists. It doesn’t depend on our children’s behavior or education. Not on our social life or relationship status. Not even on the cleanliness or organization of our homes.
It’s way too easy to get wrapped up in these things and ultimately find our identity in them. I didn’t realize until I decided to stay home after having my son that my sense of worth was intimately entwined with my writing, my full schedule, and my approval from others. I don’t like to be still. I don’t like to rest. I want to move and be on the go. This striving and impulse for achievement is rooted in my desire to control. I want to be in charge, and I want to do things my way. God has been stripping me of this control for years, reminding me He is in charge and He is worthy of my trust.
Maybe He’s teaching you the same thing through COVID-19.
We value our control, freedom, and autonomy—just as Adam and Eve in the garden of Eden. Rather than trusting in the Lord and the provision He established for them, they took matters into their own hands. They ate the forbidden fruit. They questioned God’s goodness.
“Now the serpent was the most cunning of all the wild animals that the Lord God had made. He said to the woman, “Did God really say, ‘You can’t eat from any tree in the garden’?”
The woman said to the serpent, “We may eat the fruit from the trees in the garden. But about the fruit of the tree in the middle of the garden, God said, ‘You must not eat it or touch it, or you will die.’”
“No! You will not die,” the serpent said to the woman. “In fact, God knows that when you eat it your eyes will be opened and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.” The woman saw that the tree was good for food and delightful to look at, and that it was desirable for obtaining wisdom. So she took some of its fruit and ate it; she also gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it. Then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they knew they were naked; so they sewed fig leaves together and made coverings for themselves.”
Did God really say that?
Is God really good?
Can He really be trusted?
We’ve been wrestling with these questions since the beginning of time. But Jesus, God’s own son, went to the cross and answered “Yes” to those questions a million times over.
He is really good, and He really can be trusted.
The coronavirus is not a surprise to Him. He is almighty, all-powerful, and all-knowing. What if this awful virus is the thing that He’s using to bring you back to himself? To finally force you to surrender to Him and live in light of the good news?
What if He wants you to stop your striving and rest in Him?
I know this is all easier said than done. I’m still learning, too. But I believe in God’s Word, and I believe He is who He says He is. I’m praying for health and healing throughout the world. I’m praying for miracles. I’m praying more people come to know the Lord personally and begin to live their lives for Him because of this virus. I’m praying God’s glory would be undeniable. I’m praying for you.
“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?
“And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.”