A Word for 2017

New Year’s Resolutions.

That phrase seriously makes me cringe. When I hear it, I usually think of health or fitness-related goals that end up tossed to the wayside by March. I also think of the years I spent setting goals and pursuing them in search of perfection, rather than trusting The Lord or letting His will be done.

So last year I settled on a new tactic. Rather than set goals to somehow better myself, I adopted a different way to take on the new year. I chose a word that I held close and prayed about for twelve months.

That word was freedom.

I wrote about having freedom to not have my life completely figured out:

“... when I see how much God has moved and shaken my life in the last three years, I get excited. If He can do all that He has done in such sweet and unexpected ways during this time, I cannot wait to see all He will do in the next three years. I have freedom to not plan everything or have it all figured out.

I have freedom to trust Him, even when it is hard.

That's the sentiment I want to carry with me into the new year. I hope true freedom will permeate my life in 2016—freedom to know I am right where I am supposed to be.”

Well God totally showed up.

I think, in so many ways, freedom did permeate my life in 2016. I felt free from things I’d previously been enslaved to—free from the yokes of perfection and approval. Free from my own control. In 2017, I’ll continue to pray for freedom and restoration. I can now truthfully say full freedom rests in Him alone.

Praying and thinking about freedom as much as I did helped bring it to light in my life.

A move to Nashville! A communications and ministry job! A relationship founded in Christ! The words we use to make requests to God have power. And that’s why I’ve spent the past week journaling about my word for 2017.

To help me do so, I’ve been following along with Lara Casey’s goal-setting series on her blog. Girlfriend is amazing. I recently discovered her blog and ministry, and I am so very encouraged by the way she lives out her faith through her work. It turns out she, too, believes in picking a word for the year ahead. She talks a lot about living on purpose rather than chasing perfect. That idea could not resonate more with me.

Armed with Lara's advice, I’ve looked at the challenges from this past year, as well as the blessings and the lessons I’ve learned. Where do I hope to be in the year ahead? How do I want to grow? What do I need to say yes to—and what to do I need to say no to?

Lara suggests looking for themes in the midst of all this journaling. Jot down some possible words of the year and take time to pray about the word God has actually laid on your heart.

I did just that, and I kept seeing themes of growth and depth. Nature was a common thread. Stillness, quiet, and peacefulness were all on the page.

Yet none of those words seemed quite right. I knew God would impress the right word upon my heart.

It only took a few days. I wrote down a few prayers earlier this week, and the word flowed out.

“God, I pray for depth this year. Fewer commitments, fewer things, and greater focus on you. Help me to grow deep rather than wide. You will guide me. I pray I listen and obey. Strengthen my relationship because we’re both going deeper with you. Help me to do good work at my job and on my blog because I am growing deeper in you. Let all I do be an outpouring of that depth; let it continually point back to you. I pray for deeper health, healing, courage, and freedom. Let the roots grow deep, Lord.

Rooted in you, watered daily with Scripture and prayer so that I may grow and blossom. Rooted in you, Father.”

Rooted.

That’s my word. My goal and focus for 2017. I want all that I do to be rooted in Him.

A seed is planted, and its roots slowly settle in. With water, sunlight, and proper care, the roots will grow deep. The seed will spring up into a plant and grow stronger, blossoming and flourishing in the way it was created to be all along.

Like a plant, when we’re rooted in Christ and live for Him, we, too, will grow stronger and flourish into who He has designed us to be.

“Therefore, as you have received Christ Jesus the Lord, walk in Him, rooted and built up in Him and established in faith, just as you were taught, overflowing with gratitude.”

— Colossians 2:6-7

My biggest desire for this year ahead is to stand firmly rooted in Him and to walk with Him. Growing deeply in Jesus is the first step; everything else follows suit. We can hope and dream, trusting that our Father is in control, leading us no matter what, and working all things for our ultimate good. We are blessed to live from victory of Christ rather than live for victory of our own.

As I went back to work this week, “rooted” was on my mind. It suddenly became obvious that this word came from the Lord. We as a church are going through a “Growing Up Challenge” together, learning spiritual disciplines for daily life and how to be a disciple. We even use study books called Growing Up, Firmly Planted, and Foundations. Everything points back to “rooted.” It's come full circle. 

Living out my word of the year in daily life in 2017 will take a lot of prayer. “Rooted” means saying yes to stillness, quiet, and rest. To time alone with Christ. To stepping out of my comfort zone trusting Him and knowing my foundation cannot be shaken. To gratitude, to generosity, to service. “Rooted” means saying no to comparison and selfishness. No to busyness and hustle, and definitely no to doubt and distrust. Over and over and over again.

No matter what changes occur over the next 12 months, my identity is rooted in God. My roots are unshakeable. I pray they grow deeper and stronger than I ever thought possible. I pray they remind me of exactly who I am and whose I am. 

I believe God will use "rooted" within me this year, even if in the smallest and most unexpected of ways. I'm challenging you to set your own word for 2017. Send me an email or reply in the comments below. Share it with your friends. Pray about it and offer it up to Jesus. And together, let's watch as He shows up yet again.

---

If you want to talk more about Jesus Christ and faith and what-the-heck-is-all-this-stuff, shoot me a message. I love meeting new people, whether virtually or in person, and gabbing about life. 

And if you'd like to know more of my story, you can read my testimony here.

Truly, He makes beautiful things.

God Is Up To Something

Guys. It feels like forever since I’ve written. In reality, it’s been twenty-four days—and in blog terms, that’s an eternity. My goal for 2017 is to write to you weekly. This blog has been a blessing and helped me connect with so many of you who I otherwise would not have. I love hearing your stories, answering your questions, and hopefully giving you some encouragement as you continue about your life exactly where you are. This space is part of my ministry, one I pray God grows and uses in the days, weeks, and months to come. His plan is bigger than I can comprehend, and I’m excited to be even a small part of it.

I am bursting with stories to tell you and lessons to share. I’ve let the blog take a back seat throughout November, instead focusing on being present in my new job, new church, and new home. I’ve focused on relationships here, and I’ve focused on my relationship with the Lord. In doing so, 

He keeps putting the word “restore” on my heart.

Restore (v.) — to give back or return. To put or bring back into existence or use. To repair or renovate so as to return to its original condition. Synonyms: recreate, refresh, revitalize, revive, renew.

I have been hearing “restore” over and over again. It started as a whisper and then this week grew louder and louder. I took that as a signal that it was time to write y’all a new blog post.

I’m in a season of restoration, and God is sweetly showing me what this looks like in various areas of my life.

As many of you already know, I’m a big proponent of counseling. I met with a Christian counselor regularly in New York City for the past three years and really believe everyone could benefit from a good counselor. Saying goodbye to my counselor when I moved brought me to tears. She had been with me through so much: moves, job changes, love, heartache. She counseled me as I decided to publicly affirm my faith in Christ through baptism. She watched and supported as I launched this blog. She’s been there through every up and down; my relationship with the Lord and my character as a woman of God grew under her. He had His hand on our counseling relationship, blessing it from the very start. I experienced tremendous healing from my eating disorder, anxiety, depression. And I became a true woman of the Lord.

As soon as I accepted the call to Nashville, I started looking for a counselor in the area. Through praying and consulting with those who know my story, I felt that a nutrition counselor was the best route to go. Finding one was at first an arduous process. It seemed as though I kept hitting dead ends. I actually broke down in tears one day over it.

My doubt and frustration was short-lived, though. A friend recommended her nutritionist here, and the rest is history. We’ve met twice so far; I know she’s part of the reason God has me here in Tennessee. She’s a nutritionist, a counselor, and a Christian. She knows what’s up. She just gets it. And she believes she can help guide me to full freedom, healing, and restoration from any remaining chains of the eating disorder that almost killed me eight years ago.

She used the word “restoration” on day one. That’s her goal for me. Restoration to the full woman of God I was created to be. Fearfully and wonderfully made. Knit together before birth with a name written in the stars. It’s a restoration both physical and spiritual. It’s a process I am excited about and believe God is equipping me to walk through.

In Acts 3, Peter heals a lame beggar. He speaks to all who watch him do so, reminding them this is possible through faith in Jesus Christ, whom God raised from the dead. He goes on,

“And now, brothers, I know that you did it in ignorance, just as your leaders also did. But what God predicted through the mouth of all the prophets—that His Messiah would suffer—He has fulfilled in this way. Therefore repent and turn back, so that your sins may be wiped out, that seasons of refreshing may come from the presence of the Lord, and that He may send Jesus, who has been appointed for you as the Messiah. Heaven must welcome Him until the times of the restoration of all things, which God spoke about by the mouth of His holy prophets from the beginning."

The Bible tells us we can expect a restoration of all things. Over and over again, we see that God is making all things new! This doesn't only apply to our physical bodies; it applies to our entire lives. He will create a new heaven and a new earth, and the former things shall not be remembered or come to mind (Isaiah 65:17). I began researching this theme in the Word and found such hope in the fact that He is renewing everything. Truly everything.

I was thinking a lot about the idea of restoration, and the next thing I know, I find out my church is doing a Christmas series called All Things New. Yes, really.

Shortly after that, a different friend of mine mentions Isaiah 43:19 during a completely unrelated conversation.

“Behold, I will do a new thing; now it shall spring forth; shall ye not know it? I will even make a way in the wilderness, and rivers in the desert.”

— Isaiah 43:19

I never told her “restore” was on my heart, yet here she was talking to me about a passage on renewing, reviving, and restoring.

God is up to something.

I want to tell you: Wherever you are in this very moment, know that God is doing a new thing. If you are reading this with a broken and lonely heart because the one you love doesn’t reciprocate, take comfort in the fact that God is doing a new thing. If you are wondering how you’ll make it through the holidays this year, remember that He is making a way in the wilderness. If you are questioning whether God will give you some relief from your chronic illness, know that He is bringing about the restoration of all things.  

I’m not sure when or how He will restore. I do think it’s something He’s actively doing and will fulfill in the ultimate sense when we reach His kingdom.

Yet on this Earth, He will not leave us hanging. He who made you will not forget you. Do not be afraid.

Restoration is coming, and it is beautiful beyond our wildest dreams.

---

If you want to talk more about Jesus Christ and faith and what-the-heck-is-all-this-stuff, shoot me a message. I love meeting new people, whether virtually or in person, and gabbing about life. 

And if you'd like to know more of my story, you can read my testimony here.

Truly, He makes beautiful things.

This Post Is Not About Donald Trump or Hillary Clinton

I don’t need to rehash details of this year’s presidential election to you. Today is November 4. With less than a week to go, you probably know all about the candidates, the scandals, the mudslinging, the mess. You’ve probably watched it all unfold and then burst into uncontrollable flames like I have.

It’s completely disheartening, and the more I dwell on it, the more upset I get. In fact, I couldn’t make it through the debates without a hefty dose of chocolate—and I couldn’t make it through the last one at all. How are these the two candidates we’ve ended up with? How is this the state of our country?

It feels like a joke, but it’s far from it.

A friend of mine recently shared an excerpt from C.S. Lewis’ 1942 book, The Screwtape Letters. The satirical book is a series of letters from a senior demon, Screwtape, to his young nephew, Wormwood. Screwtape assigns Wormwood to a human—the "patient"—and advises him on how to excel as the devil, how to tempt and bring to hell. I read the book a few years ago, but I completely forgot about this particular passage until my friend posted it online:

My Dear Wormwood,

Be sure that the patient remains completely fixated on politics. Arguments, political gossip, and obsessing on the faults of people they have never met serves as an excellent distraction from advancing in personal virtue, character, and the things the patient can control. Make sure to keep the patient in a constant state of angst, frustration, and general disdain towards the rest of the human race in order to avoid any kind of charity or inner peace from further developing. Ensure that the patient continues to believe that the problem is "out there" in the "broken system" rather than recognizing there is a problem with himself.

Keep up the good work,

Uncle Screwtape

This is us. This is where we are.

We’re fixated on politics, gossip, anger, and frustration. We complain about a broken system when in reality, the problem is within. This presidential election goes far beyond a system of democracy instituted by our founding fathers. It reflects the state of our hearts and the spiritual battle we face between good and evil. Satan wants to take us down in any way he can. He’ll use all the tools in his arsenal. Political dissent, debate, argument, hate, anarchy—those are a few of his favorite tools, and he’s definitely using them in our current culture.

But as Believers, our story doesn’t end here. We live for something greater. We're so distracted by politics that we've forgotten the truth. While voting and engaging in our government is so very important, it will not ultimately save our souls.

Let me put it this way: Donald Trump is not our savior.

Hillary Clinton is not our savior.

Jesus is our savior.

We can take heart for He has overcome the world.  

Understanding this truth gives me peace. It should lift our spirits. It should also encourage us to share the Good News.

I have slowly yet surely been making my way through the story of Jeremiah, and I’ve been convicted to spread the truth, even when it’s not popular. This Old Testament book is more a challenge for me to get through, but after reading some online Bible commentaries, I’ve come to better relate to it. And I can see how very relevant it is to our current culture.

The prophet Jeremiah was sent by God to teach the Israelites, a people who don’t believe in God. They don’t fear Him. They don’t obey Him. Instead they are fixed on sin, selfishness, and utter debauchery. Jeremiah tries to tell them how their lack of belief and trust in God will result in eternal wrath.

No one wants to hear his message. This kingdom could care less about the God he speaks of. They accept and promote the things God hates, and they have no qualms about this.

Jeremiah felt completely alone and discouraged. It hurt Jeremiah to see the land of Judah and Israel in such a state. Jeremiah struggled. How could he deliver God’s message to a people who strayed so far from what God intended for them? How could he tell the unpopular, convicting truth to people who didn’t want to hear it?

We will all experience rejection and discouragement in our walk with the Lord. To me, the election is incredibly discouraging. The sin we’re seeing before our eyes is not what God wants for us. It is not how He intended for us to live. It’s the result of the fall—the result of our brokenness.

But Jeremiah shows us that we can take comfort in God’s faithfulness. He knew the plans God had for him and the plans He had for Israel. To give them hope and to prosper, to give him a future. God has those plans for all who believe. His words are life, and we have to keep sharing them no matter how unpopular they are. Whether Democrat or Republican or Independent, we have to keep sharing. Even when those words seem foolish and crazy to the outside world, we're called to deliver the truth.

I pray for our nation’s leaders and for our country’s protection. I pray for peace around the world. I pray we wouldn't be distracted by our differences but that we would come together under the one who is Lord. I believe He is faithful, and I know that no matter what happens with this election, or during the next four years, I live for something more. My hope rests in Christ and Christ alone. I thank God for that.

---

If you want to talk more about Jesus Christ and faith and what-the-heck-is-all-this-stuff, shoot me a message. I love meeting new people, whether virtually or in person, and gabbing about life. 

And if you'd like to know more of my story, you can read my testimony here.

Truly, He makes beautiful things.

Praise Report

I started writing this blog post yesterday, and it was a completely different post. Feelings of frustration and anxiety overwhelmed me. I felt like I had all this pent-up (negative) energy that I needed to get out. Get the feelings off my chest and onto the page. I wrote two hundred or so words.

Those words are dark. Harsh. They come from a place of anger and irritation—a place we all sit in on some days. But I read those words back today, and I’m thankful I didn’t publish them. They don’t tell the truth of where I am in this moment, how I feel, and how the Lord is working in my life. Today my disposition is different. Maybe I’ll dig out that draft to turn it into a full post one day. But right now, it’s not an accurate depiction of my heart.

My hope is that this blog is an outpouring of exhortation, encouragement, and light. Yes, sometimes I’ll be brutally honest with you and tell you, I’m mad at God right now and feel like a mess. And that is totally okay. It’s real. We all go through those seasons, however long or short.

Yet I don’t want to sit here and complain about the little frustrations I’ve had in getting settled when the reality is that God has been unbelievably faithful. He’s showing me (yet again) that I don’t need to worry or stress.

God’s bigger picture is so much grander than my small anxieties.

He’s provided in countless ways, and I think sharing that with you is important. I don’t know what you’re going through in life right now. But what I do know is that He is working, even when things look hopeless. Please trust me in that.

Two weeks ago, I was upset with God. My subletter for my NYC apartment decided she was moving out—10 days after moving in. I instantly went to a place of fear and distress. I couldn’t afford to pay rent on that apartment, in addition to my rent here in Nashville. And I got mad at God because all I wanted was to feel settled here. How could I root into my new life when I was still so physically and financially tied to my life in New York?

I did what I do best and strategized my way through the problem. I posted about the apartment on every platform possible, spreading the word to everyone I knew. And the demand was high. Countless women from countless walks of life wanted my room. Still, I worried these women wouldn’t be the right fit for my old roomie. The situation was a dark cloud looming over me.

And the thing is: I could do very little. I had to trust God. I had to let Him work while I prayed and believed in His provision.

I was reminded by those closest to me that the Lord so clearly called me to Nashville. He wouldn’t leave this major piece of the puzzle unsolved. He provided once; he would provide again.

Provide He did. He went above and beyond this time, giving my old roommate a fellow Believer, a sweet girl that she clicked with right off the bat. He provided this within a week of starting the search. I didn’t have to pay double rent because God came through.

Why did I even doubt in the first place?

The Lord keeps showing up. It’s a cycle of me worrying, Him providing, and me being all, Wow, why did I ever distrust Him?

I live alone here in Tennessee. I thought it would be hard to be myself, yet it’s actually been refreshing and fun. My apartment complex has a tennis court. I’ve hit the pavement for the first time in years. And it feels awesome. I also now drive a car—I own said vehicle. I own a car! It is crazy and awesome. God brought me to a dealership full of fellow Christians who truly wanted to help me and not wheel and deal me. I love my car, I love driving, and I no longer fear the road like I did when I first moved here. Huge praise for that.

I am meeting a lot of wonderful people here in Tennessee. They are genuinely kind and welcoming, and I believe strong friendships are on the horizon. I’ve prayed for just one Godly man and one Godly woman to enter my life and my boyfriend’s life. People we can be friends with but who also hold us accountable, challenge us, and strengthen us in our faith. He’s putting people into our lives with the potential to be those very people for us. And he’s put us in a church body of incredibly strong men and women who believe in the Bible and strive to walk in it every day.

Praise God.

One month into my job, and I couldn’t be happier. While working in ministry is a pretty big shift, the transition has been easier than I anticipated. It feels like this is where I was always supposed to be. I’m using my giftings to engage the church, share the Gospel, and be salt and light to the world. I know there will be plenty of challenges in working at a church, but right now I am thrilled to have the opportunity to do God’s work in my 9-to-5.

In transitioning to Nashville, I knew it would be important to have a counselor near by to help me continue on the road to full freedom and be available whenever new temptations and stressors arise. After weeks of frustration over connecting with someone who is qualified, accepting new patients, and the right fit for a counseling relationship, I found someone. A new friend of mine recommended her nutrition counselor to me, and I can already tell meeting with her is going to be a really healthy step for me. She’s an expert in her field, and we connected instantly on the phone. Oh, and she’s a Believer.

I prayed about each of these things. I wanted them to happen on day one of moving here. I wanted to essentially take my New York life and transplant it here. I expected friends, community, a counselor—heck, even a fully furnished apartment—on day one. That’s not how it’s worked out. And that’s okay. Life is slowly coming together. God’s making me turn to Him and abandon my own control. Yes, that can be annoying at times. Of course, I like to be in charge and d0 things my way. But there’s something so sweet about this process. It’s freeing.

Friend, hear me when I say we don’t have to worry because He will come through. We just have to know that His provision often looks different than what we want or expect. It may look different than what we pray for. I can tell you I never would have asked to struggle with an eating disorder, or to enter treatment eight years ago, or miss my first semester of college. But now that I look back, all of that was truly a blessing because it changed the course of my life. God used that terrible pain and suffering to bring me near to Him and shape me into the woman I am today. He used all of it to take me to Nashville, this job, and this place of growth and gratitude. And I wouldn’t change that for the world.

---

If you want to talk more about Jesus Christ and faith and what-the-heck-is-all-this-stuff, shoot me a message. I love meeting new people, whether virtually or in person, and gabbing about life. 

And if you'd like to know more of my story, you can read my testimony here.

Truly, He makes beautiful things.