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Read moreWhen You Can't Sleep
At least one of us is sleeping like a baby.
Sleep. Precious, precious sleep.
I can’t remember the last time I had a good night’s sleep or a night of sleep where I didn’t wake up to either a crying baby or a mind running wild. Eight hours of sleep sounds like a dream.
Chances are you’re in the same camp as me. Maybe you have a hard time falling asleep, staying asleep, or quieting your thoughts. Maybe you also have children who wake up throughout the night. Or maybe you live in an apartment complex with paper-thin walls and noisy neighbors. Google “how to get a good night’s sleep,” and you’ll find more than a billion results.
The tips seem relatively simple:
Stick to a sleep schedule.
Avoid naps.
Turn off all screens.
Exercise during the day.
Consider a new mattress or pillow.
Etc.
Etc.
Etc.
I’ve tried these suggestions, but I still fail to get quality sleep. Can you relate?
Recently I heard a sermon from Pastor Matt Chandler in which he discussed his sleep troubles. He said he goes to bed at 9:30 p.m. but sometimes struggles with racing thoughts. Chandler said he imagines himself laying his worries at Jesus’ feet:
“I will just say in my prayers, ‘I’ve got to sleep. You don’t ever sleep. You take this and run with it while I get some rest. I’ll be right back in the morning to do whatever it is You want me to do…’”
Sometimes, Chandler ends up getting out of bed, praying, and reading until 2 in the morning. It happens. But I love his approach, to go straight to the Lord and to ask for sleep. We’re human, and our sleep issues are part of that. God knows this, and He’s always there to provide us with rest—even when physical rest alludes us.
“Come to me, all of you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take up my yoke and learn from me, because I am lowly and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your soul. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”
A couple of days after watching this sermon, I listened to a podcast interview with Jennie Allen. Allen is an author and speaker who’s passionate about discipleship. Her new book, Get Out of Your Head: Stopping the Spiral of Toxic Thoughts, details the 18 months she spent wrestling with anxiety, doubt, and sleeplessness. “Drawing on biblical teaching and neuroscience, she shows how to fight the enemies of the mind with the truth of God,” the book description states.
Allen experienced trouble sleeping and had questions about her faith in the midst of running a successful ministry, teaching the Bible, and speaking about Christ around the country. Yes, even faithful, godly men and women like Chandler and Allen can have sleepless nights.
“Keep a cool head. Stay alert. The Devil is poised to pounce, and would like nothing better than to catch you napping. Keep your guard up. You’re not the only ones plunged into these hard times. It’s the same with Christians all over the world. So keep a firm grip on the faith. The suffering won’t last forever. It won’t be long before this generous God who has great plans for us in Christ—eternal and glorious plans they are!—will have you put together and on your feet for good. He gets the last word; yes, he does. ”
All this got me wondering why? Why do we deal with this? Why can’t we simply get some quality sleep?
The short answer: We’re human. We’re sinners. We live in a broken world.
The long answer: We as Christians are prone to attacks from the enemy, and Satan is a cunning guy. He wants to disable us and render us useless. Leaving us worn out, weary, and exhausted is a pretty easy way to do that, don’t you think? When we’re tired, we’re less focused. We’re not alert or on-guard. We’re run-down and weak.
But we don’t have to be.
We live in a fallen world, except we have the hope of Christ. We have the Savior, the light of the world, who offers us a better way. We have to get up and walk in it. He saves us by faith through grace. We have to trust Him.
I think of the third sign Jesus performs, detailed in John 5:
“After this, a Jewish festival took place, and Jesus went up to Jerusalem. By the Sheep Gate in Jerusalem there is a pool, called Bethesda in Aramaic, which has five colonnades. Within these lay a large number of the disabled—blind, lame, and paralyzed.
One man was there who had been disabled for thirty-eight years. When Jesus saw him lying there and realized he had already been there a long time, he said, “Do you want to get well?”
“Sir,” the disabled man answered, “I have no one to put me into the pool when the water is stirred up, but while I’m coming, someone goes down ahead of me.”
“Get up,” Jesus told him, “pick up your mat and walk.” Instantly the man got well, picked up his mat,and started to walk.”
The disabled man is healed not by the pool but by his faith in Jesus. God tells him to “get up and walk,” and I believe that’s a call for all of us. We can remain run-down when we’re tired, or we can adopt an attitude of faith. We can get up and walk.
That’s super convicting for me.
I honestly can’t remember the last time I got a good night’s rest. Even before our son was before, during the latter half of pregnancy, I was constantly waking up to pee or because I felt uncomfortable. Now I’m lying awake at bedtime with my mind on overdrive, or I’m waking up because I’m anxious or because my baby is crying. The cycle is enough to make someone feel a little crazy.
As I’ve taken this sleep struggle to God, I’ve started to realize it’s often a spiritual attack. I can be crabby, angry, and lethargic, or I can open the Word every day, pray to God, and continue to walk by faith. This is something I’m still processing, and I think I’ll continue to throughout my life.
God wants us to rest in Him.
“Therefore, in order to keep me from becoming conceited, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”
Paul, one of God’s greatest missionaries and disciples, had a thorn in his flesh that God never removed. We don’t know exactly what that thorn was, but we do know that Paul trusted in the Lord in the midst of his weakness. For me, sleeplessness is definitely a weakness. I can’t get through it without God. I just can’t.
My She Reads Truth bible puts it this way:
“Our insufficiency helps us press into Christ’s sufficiency… Anything that causes us to depend on Christ is a good thing. When we lean on Him, we will always, always, always find Him strong enough to hold us up.”
Let us pray:
Father, help me put on the full armor of God. Help me press into Your sufficiency in the midst of my exhaustion and insufficiency. Give me rest. Refresh my soul. Help me to walk in Your way. Thank you for Your truth, Your love, and Your care. Make me more like You.
In Your holy name, I pray.
Amen.
6 Ways to Make Friends in a New City
We moved to Denver at the end of 2019, leaving behind three years of building up our community in Nashville. Colorado is a completely new environment for us, and we’re in the process of making it our home. We are creating new rhythms for our family and so thankful for this fresh start here. I don’t think I’ll ever tire of waking up to see the mountains each day!
Part of making this our home means making friends. But, how on earth do you do that as a stay-at-home mom? Or in my husband’s case, when you work a busy full-time job?
I’m no longer sharing a commute with my roommate or chatting with my co-workers at lunch. In fact, my bestie happens to be about 10 months old and likes to nap twice a day. He’s a whole lot of fun, although it is a little hard when he can’t talk back to me (😉).
Jesus, God himself, had friends—12 disciples in his core group. But three of those men, Peter, James, and John, were his best friends. They were present for moments that the other disciples were not, and they knew Jesus intimately. God demonstrates for us the importance of friendship and reminds us to “stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near.” (Hebrews 10:24-25)
A word of hope if you feel lonely right now: God wants to be your friend.
It might sound cliche, but it’s true. You’ll always have a friend in Jesus. In fact, He said it himself:
“This is my command: Love one another as I have loved you. No one has greater love than this: to lay down his life for his friends. You are my friends if you do what I command you. I do not call you servants anymore, because a servant doesn’t know what his master is doing. I have called you friends, because I have made known to you everything I have heard from my father. You did not choose me, but I chose you. I appointed you to go and produce fruit and that you fruit should remain, so that whatever you ask the Father in my name, he will give you. This is what I command you: Love one another.” (John 15:12-17)
I find that so encouraging. We’re never alone when we have Christ.
Maybe you’re in a new place or a new season of life like me. So let’s get out there together! Here are six ways to make new friends:
1. Check out the local library.
Okay, the library has been my jam. If you’re a mom or dad, you’ve got to get in on the free weekday story time. My son adores the stories, music, and time with other littles. I’m loving the selection of books, audiobooks, and magazines, as well as the discounts on local museums, zoos, restaurants, and businesses. Our library facilitates a number of book clubs for various interests that I’d love to join once Charlie is a little older. Oh, and did I mention it’s all free?
2. Get involved at your church.
We recently found our church home and are excited about all the opportunities to form community. I’ve been attending a weekly Bible study while my son hangs out in the nursery. There are a lot of other groups at all times of the day and for all life stages, such as Celebrate Recovery, Financial Peace University, and even a Bible journaling class. Being involved in the local church is such a core part of our lives as Christ followers, and how awesome we get to make friends that way, too.
3. Sign up for the YMCA.
You can sign up for any gym, but I really like the YMCA for its plethora of programs and Christ-fueled mission. A family membership is super reasonable and includes the gym, workout classes, a pool, and more, depending on your location. They also offer childcare, which is great if you’re a mom of young children. I’m looking forward to taking some yoga and barre classes and enrolling our son in swim lessons this summer.
4. Take a class or join a group.
Consider taking a class for something you’ve always wanted to learn. Piano? Cooking? Knitting? There’s a class for that. I’ve had my eye on a pasta-making class at Whole Foods for a while now, and what better friends are out there than fellow Italian food lovers? Eventbrite has no shortage of local events and groups, and I’ve also heard good things about Meetup.com.
5. Volunteer.
Volunteering is good for you and good for others. Your church is likely connected to various ministries that can use your help. You can also reach out to your local food bank, pregnancy care center, or parks department for more opportunities. Meet others, and live out God’s command to love your neighbor. It’s been a long time since I’ve volunteered, but I’m ready to use my time and giftings to give back.
6. Hang out at the park.
If you have little ones, take them to the park. They’ll get some fresh air and physical activity, while you can chat with other parents. This one may take some stepping outside of your comfort zone. But I’d be willing to bet the other moms or dads are looking for friends just like you.
How do you make new friends? I’d love to hear your ideas in the comments below.
My Word of the Year
My nine-month-old son wakes up every morning full of joy. He still cries and fusses most nights for at least a little bit, but come morning, he is happy. Come morning, he is excited and ready to start the day. He’s babbling and rolling all around in his crib. As soon as he sees his mom or dad, he squeals with excitement. His delight is contagious.
When was the last time you woke up like that?
It’s certainly not my tendency.
Lately I seem to wake up feeling exhausted, not wanting to get out of bed, it’s cold, it’s dark, why was my son up so many times last night, I’m still tired, I’m not ready for this day…
The list rolls on.
What if I started the day with a grateful heart?
I’ve noticed that attitude is everything. I can choose to be thankful. I can choose to be positive. I can choose my reaction to situations. I can choose to worship God, even when I’m tired or anxious or simply don’t feel like it.
I too easily allow my hormones, the amount of sleep I got, and how much coffee I drank to affect my entire mood. I quickly snap at my husband with words that cut deep. I complain about my work as a stay-at-home mom, even though it’s a job I love and know I’ve been called to. I grumble at the dirty dishes and laundry piles. I berate myself not writing enough, not exercising enough, and even not praying enough. My peace is quickly shaken by my circumstances.
For the past four years, I’ve picked a word as we head into a new year. Rather than set a new year’s resolution, I’ve chosen a word that I’ve prayed about. It’s a word that I’ve felt God put on my heart. Sure enough, for four years, as each of those 12 months go by, I’ve seen God use that word in my life and show me more of Him through it.
That’s why, this year, I’m choosing a word that’s been right in front of me for a long time, and I’m finally claiming it for myself as we head into this new decade.
Joy.
For years, I’ve had a virtual sticky note on my desktop with James 1:2-12:
“Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord. Such a person is double-minded and unstable in all they do.
Blessed is the one who perseveres under trial because, having stood the test, that person will receive the crown of life that the Lord has promised to those who love him.”
I recently took a moment to read this when I opened my laptop. James said we should consider sufferings, of any kind, as pure joy. What was he talking about? How could he say that?
James knows that all who would read the Word of God would have the story of Jesus.
We would be offered eternal hope in the Kingdom of God, saved by grace through faith (Ephesians 2:8). James understood that no matter what we faced on this earth, we as believers in Christ would have eternal life to look forward to. We’d have an unshakeable hope, a future that’s secure, and victory over the enemy.
That’s pure joy.
I want that, and I’m committing to choose a life of joy in the Lord this year. It’s time I live in light of my salvation, remembering all God has done for me. Living in light of His promises as the free woman and the new self that I am. Maybe it’s time for you to do the same.
Colossians 3:1-17 says:
“If then you have been raised with Christ, seek the things that are above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth. or you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God. When Christ who is your life appears, then you also will appear with him in glory.
Put to death therefore what is earthly in you: sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry. On account of these the wrath of God is coming. In these you too once walked, when you were living in them. But now you must put them all away: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and obscene talk from your mouth. Do not lie to one another, seeing that you have put off the old self with its practices and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge after the image of its creator. Here there is not Greek and Jew, circumcised and uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave, free; but Christ is all, and in all.
Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God. And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.”
That passage is worth meditating on, friends. I’m choosing joy because I want to put off anger and obscene talk. I want to fight back against the lies of the enemy who tells me I’m not good enough and who tries to take away my contentment. I want to put on a compassionate heart, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience. Forgiveness. Love. I want to give thanks to God in all that I do.
So this year I’m praying for continual joy in this life God has given me and called me to. Pure, unadulterated joy in all circumstances. I have a living hope! And I’m ready to rejoice in it, with inexpressible and glorious joy.
“Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. Because of his great mercy he has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead and into an inheritance that is imperishable, undefiled, and unfading, kept in heaven for you. You are being guarded by God’s power through faith for a salvation that is ready to be revealed in the last time. You rejoice in this, even though now for a short time, if necessary, you suffer grief in various trials so that the proven character of your faith—more valuable than gold which, though perishable, is refined by fire—may result in praise, glory, and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ. Though you have not seen him, you love him; though not seeing him now, you believe in him, and you rejoice with inexpressible and glorious joy, because you are receiving the goal of your faith, the salvation of your souls.”