7 Ways to Stay Connected Right Now

If you’re like me, you’re probably craving connection right now. Pandemic life is strange, but this looks like it’s going to be our new normal (at least for a while). So how do you stay in touch with friends, meet new people, and get out safely? Here are seven easy ideas. And I’d love to hear what you’ve been up to and how you’re staying connected! Leave me a comment below.

1. Check out your local church.

Our church reopened a few months ago, and we’ve been so thankful. Worship services are definitely different than they used to be, especially without a children’s ministry. But there’s simply no replacement for being around other believers on a Sunday morning. If you haven’t yet found a church in your neighborhood, I’d recommend checking out churches near you in the Acts29 Network, SBC, and Redeemer Church’s City to City Network. Most of these churches stream services live on Sundays and record sermon podcasts each week.

Your church might even be offering home Bible studies where you can safely meet with others in person. Many churches also have life groups or community groups, as well as various support groups. And don’t forget about Biblical counseling—a great way to connect when you’re feeling anxious, depressed, overwhelmed, or just need a bit of extra support. 

2. Register for MOPS or BSF.

These organizations were integral in helping me maintain a sense of normalcy last year as a new mom. MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers) and BSF (Bible Study Fellowship) both have groups throughout the country. Depending on where you live, you might even be able to meet in person.

3. Go outside.

Fall is upon us, and there’s no better time to get outside. We’ve loved playing tennis, taking walks, and going to the playground. My sister actually started a tennis “club” with three of her girlfriends—a free, safe, and easy way to stay connected. (Plus, who doesn’t love the endorphins from exercise?) Ask a friend to join you outdoors or look into local sports leagues to hone your competitive side.

4. Join the gym.

If using an elliptical while wearing a mask sounds like your worst nightmare, take heart! Many group fitness classes are moving outdoors this fall. Our local recreation center has dance, yoga, HIIT, and other classes in various parks. See what your gym has to offer. This is a great way to stay active and meet new people.

5. Sign up for LO Sister.

Is there anything Sadie Robertson can’t do? Girlfriend shares the word of God in a way that’s full of passion and fire. I love it. She also has a heart for connecting women with other women, which led her to create the Live Original Sister online community. It’s for women of all ages and walks of life, with a focus on sisterhood, relationships, and mentorship. Check it out here.

6. Make a VidHug.

My cousin introduced me to VidHug—the 21st century, COVID-era way to give a hug. To start a VidHug, you can send a link to family and friends, asking them to record a short video with their message for the receipt. Happy birthday, happy anniversary, congratulations, you name it. Once they submit their videos, VidHug turns them into a beautiful montage for you to share. It’s easy and fun, especially if your friends are long-distance. We’re hoping to make one of these for my grandma when she turns 95 next month.

7. Call a friend and send snail mail.

Last but not least, call a friend or mail a letter! Two of the oldest ways to connect with people are still the best. Hearing a friend’s voice is always better than texting. And you’ll make someone’s day by sending a card or letter. If you want to design your own cards, you can usually find cardstock and colored pencils at Target or Walmart for less than $5. Dollar Tree and Trader Joe’s also have adorable options that are always $1.

Have fun staying connected!

How to Handle Conflict Well

I don’t like conflict. I don’t like arguments or drama. I don’t think many people do. Yet even as believers, we will have conflicts with one another. We will fight, and we will cause hurts. 

Thankfully, scripture shows us how to treat one another and how to handle conflicts when they arise. This is something I am still learning how to do well. As Jesus says to the scribes and Pharisees in John 8:7, “The one without sin among you should be the first to throw a stone at her [the adulteress].” Jesus is the only perfect one. He’s the only one without sin. So even when we feel wronged by others, we have to remember that we’re far from perfect. 

I’m a sinner, and I know I have hurt people in the past and will hurt people in the future. But I want to be a peacemaker. I want to handle conflict well. Ultimately, I want to follow the example of Christ.

“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God.”

— Matthew 5:9

These seven tips will help you resolve conflict in a healthy way. (Other suggestions? I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments below.)

1. Pray.

“Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.”

— 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

I often want to make lists, talk things out, read an article, or somehow try to solve a problem on my own before I turn to God. But prayer needs to come first. Prayer is how we talk to God and how He speaks to us.

Ask Him for wisdom and discernment. Ask for grace, compassion, and the words to say to your friend. Then ask for Him to shine a light on your own sin. 

2. Examine your own heart.

“Why do you see the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye?”

— Matthew 7:3

This one is tough. I’m thankful for friends who hold me accountable and remind me that I am a sinner, too. Jesus is the only perfect man—who’s also fully God. When you feel hurt or wronged by someone, examine your own heart, too. We all likely have a log in our own eyes. 

3. Address it without delay.

Even though it might feel uncomfortable, address the conflict as soon as possible rather than putting it off. Doing so is better for your relationship in the long run. Trust me, I’ve learned this the hard way. You don’t want bitterness and resentment to crop up and slowly take over like weeds. Address things quickly, honestly, and courageously face-to-face—or at least on the phone. Please, no texting. 

4. Listen.

Hopefully your friend is willing to talk to you to resolve this conflict. When they do, make sure you listen genuinely. Let them say what they need to say, even if it feels awkward for you. Listen and give them your full attention. 

5. Confess and repent.

I have been studying the book of John over the past few weeks, and I have been especially struck by Jesus’ restoration of Peter in John 21. Peter had denied Jesus three times before His death. But when He returns resurrected, Jesus gives Peter three opportunities to state His love (or deny Him again). Peter declares his love and faith.

“Lord you know everything; you know that I love you,” Peter says.

Peter has repented, and the Lord offers bold forgiveness and mercy. If we are to follow the example of Jesus, then we, too, are to confess and repent. “I’m sorry” are two simple words that go a very long way. 

6. Forgive.

“For if you forgive others their offenses, your heavenly Father will forgive you as well. But if you don’t forgive others, your Father will not forgive your offenses.”

— Matthew 6:14-15

Holding a grudge is a surefire way to destroy a relationship, not to mention your own emotional and spiritual health. As believers, we know that we have been forgiven much. Our Father has forgiven us for our sins, and He will continue to forgive us for future sins. We have done nothing to deserve this! 

“But God shows His love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”

— Romans 5:8

When I meditate on that verse, I am so convicted. Jesus washes my sins away and offers me a clean slate every single day. He shows his grace and mercy. I’m not saying you need to condone continual, purposeful, unrepentant sin. But I am saying you need to forgive. If we are to live out the Lord’s command as light in this world, we have to forgive. 

I’ve had broken relationships in my life where I held onto hurt, pain, and blame for years. When I finally was able to forgive, I experienced freedom like never before. Keep praying God would soften your heart and cultivate tenderness leading to forgiveness. 

7. Propose a solution.

Explain how much the person means to you. Share how you value them and their friendship. Then propose a solution to move forward. Affirming the other person is crucial. You’re letting them know you love them, even after the hurts you’ve (both) experienced. 

“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”

— John 13:34-35

6 Ways to Make Friends in a New City

We moved to Denver at the end of 2019, leaving behind three years of building up our community in Nashville. Colorado is a completely new environment for us, and we’re in the process of making it our home. We are creating new rhythms for our family and so thankful for this fresh start here. I don’t think I’ll ever tire of waking up to see the mountains each day!

Part of making this our home means making friends. But, how on earth do you do that as a stay-at-home mom? Or in my husband’s case, when you work a busy full-time job? 

I’m no longer sharing a commute with my roommate or chatting with my co-workers at lunch. In fact, my bestie happens to be about 10 months old and likes to nap twice a day. He’s a whole lot of fun, although it is a little hard when he can’t talk back to me (😉). 

Jesus, God himself, had friends—12 disciples in his core group. But three of those men, Peter, James, and John, were his best friends. They were present for moments that the other disciples were not, and they knew Jesus intimately. God demonstrates for us the importance of friendship and reminds us to “stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near.” (Hebrews 10:24-25) 

A word of hope if you feel lonely right now: God wants to be your friend.

It might sound cliche, but it’s true. You’ll always have a friend in Jesus. In fact, He said it himself:

“This is my command: Love one another as I have loved you. No one has greater love than this: to lay down his life for his friends. You are my friends if you do what I command you. I do not call you servants anymore, because a servant doesn’t know what his master is doing. I have called you friends, because I have made known to you everything I have heard from my father. You did not choose me, but I chose you. I appointed you to go and produce fruit and that you fruit should remain, so that whatever you ask the Father in my name, he will give you. This is what I command you: Love one another.” (John 15:12-17)

I find that so encouraging. We’re never alone when we have Christ.

Maybe you’re in a new place or a new season of life like me. So let’s get out there together! Here are six ways to make new friends:

1. Check out the local library.

Okay, the library has been my jam. If you’re a mom or dad, you’ve got to get in on the free weekday story time. My son adores the stories, music, and time with other littles. I’m loving the selection of books, audiobooks, and magazines, as well as the discounts on local museums, zoos, restaurants, and businesses. Our library facilitates a number of book clubs for various interests that I’d love to join once Charlie is a little older. Oh, and did I mention it’s all free? 

2. Get involved at your church.

We recently found our church home and are excited about all the opportunities to form community. I’ve been attending a weekly Bible study while my son hangs out in the nursery. There are a lot of other groups at all times of the day and for all life stages, such as Celebrate Recovery, Financial Peace University, and even a Bible journaling class. Being involved in the local church is such a core part of our lives as Christ followers, and how awesome we get to make friends that way, too.

3. Sign up for the YMCA.

You can sign up for any gym, but I really like the YMCA for its plethora of programs and Christ-fueled mission. A family membership is super reasonable and includes the gym, workout classes, a pool, and more, depending on your location. They also offer childcare, which is great if you’re a mom of young children. I’m looking forward to taking some yoga and barre classes and enrolling our son in swim lessons this summer. 

4. Take a class or join a group.

Consider taking a class for something you’ve always wanted to learn. Piano? Cooking? Knitting? There’s a class for that. I’ve had my eye on a pasta-making class at Whole Foods for a while now, and what better friends are out there than fellow Italian food lovers? Eventbrite has no shortage of local events and groups, and I’ve also heard good things about Meetup.com.   

5. Volunteer.

Volunteering is good for you and good for others. Your church is likely connected to various ministries that can use your help. You can also reach out to your local food bank, pregnancy care center, or parks department for more opportunities. Meet others, and live out God’s command to love your neighbor. It’s been a long time since I’ve volunteered, but I’m ready to use my time and giftings to give back.

6. Hang out at the park.

If you have little ones, take them to the park. They’ll get some fresh air and physical activity, while you can chat with other parents. This one may take some stepping outside of your comfort zone. But I’d be willing to bet the other moms or dads are looking for friends just like you. 

How do you make new friends? I’d love to hear your ideas in the comments below.

A Letter to the Friend Who Is Struggling

A few friends have recently disclosed to me that they have friends or family members in the midst of a struggle with an eating disorder. Hearing this breaks my heart. I wouldn't want anyone to go through that struggle, and I know it has to be so difficult looking from the outside in at someone you love in such pain. 

I want this blog to a be a place of encouragement and hope. Not because of me and my words, but because of Christ. So a major part what I can do—really the biggest thing we all can do—is pray. Prayer moves the heart of God and moves our hearts. Prayer keeps us in tune with what He's saying to us. Prayer reminds us of our need for Him.

If someone close to you is struggling with mental illness, pray for them. Pray that God would heal them fully and provide recovery in a way that only He can. Pray for patience and trust. 

I wrote the short letter below for a friend of a friend who is wrestling with an eating disorder. If you, too, know someone who's hurting, will you send this to them? 

They can read this note and they can read my testimony, but mostly I hope that they read God's Word. The Bible is a lamp for my feet, a light for my path. It directs me, teaches me, and sustains me every single day. I'm not writing this to you as a woman who's 100 percent healed and who never deals with a negative thought about food or body image.

I'm writing this to you as a woman who's seen what Satan is capable of, who's played around with darkness, and who's been radically saved from death by the grace and power of Jesus Christ. I'm writing this as a woman who wants everyone to taste the sweetness of a relationship with God. It will change your life.

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Hi friend,

How are you? 

I want you to know you are not alone in this fight. I've shared your same struggle for years, and I understand what you are feeling and going through. More than that, Jesus understands. He knows your pain, your hurts, and your frustrations. And He can provide comfort the way no one else can.

Someone recently shared insight with me that I never thought about before. In Genesis 3, sin entered the world through an apple, through a woman taking a bite of this forbidden fruit. Sin entered the world through food. Think of how many women today struggle with food and their bodies; that's the sin nature within us. But how sweet is God to redeem this! To invite us into communion with him, to feast at the table of the lamb. Our story doesn't stop with Eve in Genesis. We now have a great hope in the resurrected Jesus. 

God's Word has been a light to me in the midst of terrible darkness.

He's reminded me that the testing of our faith produces endurance (James 1:3). That trials help refine us and make us more like him. He is the vine; we are the branches. He is continually pruning us. 

“We all, with unveiled faces, are looking as in a mirror at the glory of the Lord and are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory; this is from the Lord who is the Spirit.”

— 2 Corinthians 3:18

Are being transformed. That's present tense. That means it's happening now. I just love that. We are not perfect, but we serve a God who is. He has been tested in every way as we are, yet without sin. (Hebrews 4:15) We can run to Him and trust that He hears us!

He loves us and has called us to Himself even while we are still sinners.

When we accept Christ, our identity is completely changed. We were dead, but we have been made alive with the Messiah. Saved by grace through faith. (Ephesians 2:5) He brings us back to life. His Holy Spirit lives within us. I cling to that truth whenever I feel shameful or guilty. I pray we live as men and women who are free because we are in Christ Jesus. 

“Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away, and look new things have come. Everything is from God, who reconciled us to Himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation.”

— 2 Corinthians 5:17-18

A new creation. That is how God see us and wants us to see ourselves. 

Hold fast to the Truth. Ask God for full healing from the inside out. Surrender to Him on a daily basis, and never forget that He loves you and is faithful.

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If you want to talk more about Jesus Christ and faith and what-the-heck-is-all-this-stuff, shoot me a message. I love meeting new people, whether virtually or in person, and gabbing about life. 

And if you'd like to know more of my story, you can read my testimony here.

Truly, He makes beautiful things.